Meet Jessica! Known as ‘MuscleMemory,’ she is a 33-year-old fanfiction author and fandom member from Germany.
How long have you been writing?
I think I started when I was 15 or 16 with poems and short stories, then fanfiction, with a lot of breaks in between. I took part in RPGs and wrote original stuff with others, too. I came back to fanfiction not even a couple years ago. I was mostly too scared to publish anything, though, and I was actually doing it on FF.net in another fandom, but then Malec found me and everything else was suddenly history…
How did you get involved in the Shadowhunters fandom?
I only checked out the show for Harry Shum Jr. because I’ve always adored him, and I stayed for Magnus. Then one evening, I was suddenly on YouTube checking out Malec fan videos…(at the time, there were only a few and short ones because it was still the beginning of S1) and I fell in love so hard. I’ve never experienced anything like it. I was GONE.
What is the appeal of fanfiction to you?
To explore the canon world and AU worlds and be able to live through anything I want through the characters, control everything, and give them a happy end no matter what. There are a lot of topics and emotions I feel I have locked inside somewhere, and only through the characters can I let them out and deal with them, and even give them a name or try to understand them.
I also find it easier to take something already existing and change and expand on that rather than creating something completely new, especially when I love the characters and feel a connection. I also find it challenging and fascinating how some fanfiction stories may change the characters to an extent that wouldn’t happen otherwise in ways that may only work in that certain story and that certain world.
What character or aspect of the Shadowhunters world makes you want to write?
I love fantasy and what’s possible, because anything is. You can come up with any scenario ever and it works in such a world. Saying that, I usually prefer AU settings, but the Shadow World has a lot to give and my mind chooses to stay in it most of the time and expand on it. Magnus and Alec in that world are also just the most fascinating, as is the Parabatai bond. Where else does something so complex, unique, tragic, and beautiful exist? Those two bonds really tear me apart regularly and I’m trying to make sense of it and find a way for them, and me to cope as well, when I write.
What emotion do you most like to write and why?
Deep, all-encompassing, soul-corroding love, heartache, torment. I don’t know why…it’s just this honest, innermost, purest something inside of me that can never come out except when I write. I used to be scared that it was too much, that people couldn’t relate, couldn’t see it as something real. I used to hold back a lot in my writing, but I try not to do that anymore because even if there are a few people who can relate, that’s all that matters. I just have to let it free.
What is your favorite fanfiction trope?
I’m not sure I know a lot of tropes, to be honest… Coffee shop AUs are the ones that come across my dash over and over again ;-). I don’t think I mind any, but also not sure what to call my favorite. There’s definitely something for everyone out there, which is what’s so great about it.
What ships do you ship, and why do you love them so much?
Malec always and forever because they’re one in a trillion, against all the odds, against prejudices, against worlds separating them; their hearts find each other and just know, ‘You’re for me and I’m for you, always.’ I also love Lydia/Izzy because they’re so beautiful together. I’m just wowed by them. I don’t really mind most ships and I have no problem ignoring what I don’t like.
What has been the best part of your fandom experience so far?
There have been a lot of negative experiences, to be honest, but just when I needed them, I found a few people who made it all worthwhile and by far outweigh the bad. I’m so grateful to every single one of them for being kind, and respectful, and open-minded, and for supporting me and others when things become too much.
What’s your favorite scene you’ve ever written?
I have NO idea, but this one is on my mind a lot…
His ears prick up at the sound of birds, seagulls? He opens his eyes, astounded by the sight before him. They’re somewhere at the sea, high up on a cliff where the sun is setting, tinging the horizon in soft red, orange, yellow and blue colors, streaked with white, grey and black clouds, below them the vast sea, and he can hear waves crashing against the sturdy rock beneath them.
As he looks up there are a dozen seabirds circling above the cliffs, calling. He closes his eyes and inhales fervently, leaning back against the strong body he’s half lying against. He needn’t see whose it is, there’s only one person gifting him with this extent of care and safety.
As his eyes are taking in the beautiful sight before them he brings Magnus’ hands up and kisses his knuckles, Magnus’ arms around him tightening.
“Where are we?”
Share with us an out of context line from one of your fics.
The moment Alec’s eyes would open, a pair of nebulas, shining with life and wonder, cocooning him with love and warmth, Magnus would be lulled back into hopeful security, his truth slithering back into dark oblivion.
Like what you see? You can read MuscleMemory’s fan fiction on Archive of Our Own, or follow her on Tumblr and Twitter.
